Who and Why

I began singing opera because of Violetta. Now, I am going meet her.

Friday, October 26, 2012

[Untitled]- Honoring the Process

First, for anyone who has seen the hilarious movie, <Untitled>, please know I am fully aware at how ironic I am being in writing a blog about it. But- I couldn't NOT comment on a movie that so closely imitates art that imitates life that imitates my life that imitates my art that I love. Let us begin...

<Untitled> is ultimately a very dark and funny conversation about what good art is. You have the artist who mass produces that horrible art everyone knows because it hangs in every lobby in every hotel in the USA. You have the art gallery owner using this same artist to actually financially support the crazy "post it note on the wall" art you find in Chelsea Art Galleries. Then, finally, all of this is underscored, literally, by a composer who writes extremely advant-garde music.

I am not up on the art scene- which <Untitled> makes fun of with humor and almost painful accuracy. It's with the poor composer that my heart (and the movie's -heart- if there is one) really embraced. What I found so poignant about composer's character is that he is so hell bent on making anything seem like something that actually nothing is being said at all (he literally kicks a bucket in his performance- without realizing how ironic he is actually being- he just likes the sound of the bucket being kicked). His frustration takes a turning point when he hears a very beautiful concert by an older composer (much older) and an audience member goes up to him and says, "I just don't get this? Why did you write this? I hope the next one is better" (which is hilarious and horrible because this guy is like 85 years old). The composer goes up to this older man and says, "How do you deal with this?" And the wise old man says, "It doesn't matter- you have to honor the process."

Which leads me to this blog. Part of writing a blog is exactly this- honoring the process. Whether it be singing, or working in the arts field behind the scene, or doing the dishes, all we really have is the process. All we have is here to there and what is in between. And when we realize there is this "in between", we slow down and focus on the here and now. I must say, I am really relishing in this right now.

But- what happens when the process sucks?

I am currently rehearsing for a concert I am not that thrilled about doing. And it's not because I think the concert is bad but because I am at that point where I rather do other things with my life.  But, I joined up because a) I love to sing and b) I get to sing with my friends and c) some of the music is a challenge for me. However, it was June when I signed up; it's now October and that June person is far far away.   The process for this concert has not been a good one. The music has been more challenging than I thought- which I am usually good about but when one's focus has shifted to not singing professionally anymore- one thinks- why did I do this to myself? Then, there have been many many rehearsals in far away places. So, we grin and bear it. Right? Hmm...I rather not- it's cheating the audience and cheating my experience (so I know not to do this again!). But- what about that June person? Why did she sign up again? Ah right...because of a) and b)- and let's not worry about c) so much. And by honoring that choice, I am honoring this experience.

How is that for process!?






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